That day has came already. *deep sigh*

One would think I have to be flooding the room with tears now, but no - somehow I'm just so greatly empty inside, so unexplainably disappointed...and disappointed in myself for I've been treating Ray (and still am treating him) like a piece of shit.

There must be something wrong with me.

I get upset at something totally idiotic, tell him something damn sarcastic & nasty aloud, call him stupid & brainless, hurt him and then I regret it all.

Please, someone slap me or kick me so I'll come back to normal. =_=

Now when I think of it again, it's not necessary that there's something wrong with me. It may be just that I'm a born bitch, you know?
YEAH, that'll be it.

It's already March 10th & Ray has stayed here in Slovakia since February 14th. The time flies so fast....I can't even believe it. ._.
Few weeks of being in a more or less normal relationship & now it's here again - the separation.
FUCK IT. FUCK IT!!! >_<

You know, I dream about one simple thing.
I dream about one day having a normal relationship by what I mean a loving relationship with my boyfriend being in the same city as me.

I've never experienced such!!!! O_o

My wavy haired ex-net-boyfriend Pom lives in the far far away Thailand. When we were "together" it was totally lousy. He's not a type of guy for a long distance relationship, not cuz he's not loyal but cuz he isn't online enuff! Eeeh. =_= But btw, it's amazing that I'm on way better terms with him now than in our so called "relationship". I'm like a younger sis to him & he's like an older bro. ^^ Two abnormal siblings. Hahaha. :P

And Ray....Ray...my 2nd & hopefully the last bf...he's in the far away Malaysia. FUCK IT. >_<

I wonder sometimes if I deserve him? He's so tame, good, caring & polite and I'm the EXACT OPPOSITE. It's not true that opposites attract, don't believe in that! Opposites argue, that's the correct version. >_>
In our case, usually Mich argues & Ray gets hurt. Aiyaaaah. If I were him, I'd leave me already. But you see, he's just like I said - "so tame, good, caring & polite" and he wouldn't do that!!!
I dunno if to be grateful or angry! \

Grateful for SUCH a boyfriend or angry for SUCH a great guy having SUCH a bitchy girlfriend. :P


Oh well...1.15am & I'm waking up at 6am tmr. Must go sleep now. The next post will be after I send my duckyboy off home to the beautiful Kuala Lumpur & hopefully not go jump off High Tatra's peaks. =_=

I. HATE. GOODBYES.

How do you find the words to say
To say goodbye
If your heart don't have the heart to say
To say goodbye

(Alicia Keys - "Goodbye" from her debut album Songs In A Minor. All da lyrics!)

GOODBYE.
GOODBYE.
*sniff*

 

This is such a fucked up week.

Sayang is leaving & I need to spend all the time I can with him BUT I must be a good girl & attend my SUPER-EXTRA-ENDLESSLY FUCKED UP HIGH SHITSCHOOL, Pom has probs with gf so I feel like I should at least try to catch him online & talk to him a bit, I'm broke & have to buy two caps for Chris & Sofia and in the shitschool they demand to know useless things from me. >_<

I think I'll move to rural Laos & start to live a life of a simple village woman. =_= I want my only concern to be whether my pak chois are grown enuff and my kids and village husband happy.

Oh yes, and if the market with fashionable clothes from China is opening on this Thursday also.

Ahhhh, I want that life. *_*

But instead of that, I must go to school now. FUCK IT. >_<

It's TUESDAY today.

And that day - FRIDAY - is just THREE FUCKING DAYS away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! TT_TT TT_TT u_u @_@ @_# #_=

I'm not gonna survive it. I'm NOT. I'll die of sadness, cry on ocean, try to chase the plane with duckyboy, go sell my body to earn for an airtic (anyone wants? *licks lips sexily* Hahaha! XD), fall into an endless depression & then slack off the school, daydream abt being in KL & rot on the bed which will be wet with tears.

SAVE ME, SOMEONE. =_=

I don't want Friday to come.
Stop the time, if you can. *sniff*

Here, my dear duckies. Finally. The PICTURES! ^^
(Mind me playing around with Photoshop, that's why it's so lousy~)

*ahem ahem*

The pics from the nearby forest:


Our personal Winter Sonata! ^^ Yu Jin - me, Joon Sang - Ray! Haha! I love this pic, I think it's just great. ^_^

We've been playing around with the snow in the forest like 3 days ago as we were out with Haku who was doing crazy stuffs (along with my duckyboy, haha!).

Haku was staring at this hole with maybe 2m of water (as Ray estimated) as long as he finally fell down to it, panicked, swam around crazily & jumped away as quickly as possible. Crazy dog. XD


See how little, dry, red & frozen my hand is? And see how big, pink, tanned & warm duckyboy's hand is? ^^
I apologize for the irrelevant stars, I was playing with the Photoshop brushes. :P


My duckyboy's VERY FIRST LOUSY SNOWCREATURE!!!!! With sepet Asian eyes, see that? Hohohooo! :D

Now the pics from Vienna:


AH LIAN AT WORK. *slaps head*
OMP, I've never thought it's gonna be this bad with me but you see, I'm wearing a pink t-shirt & putting on glittery eyeshadows. =_= Ah lians like me must be pretty in Vienna. Duh~~~ *hides in hubooby's Hell-No Kitty tomb* XD @_@


This is probably a square called Schwarzenberger Platz although I'm really not sure abt it. Eeeh. It's not far away from the Sudbahnhof Wien & also not too far away from the Burgring. Lonely grey place, don't you think?


This is one hella kool market at the Burgring! Wah!!!


Sayang in front of some important huge grey building.

And that's it for now.

HOWEVER, I have a BONUS PICTURE & that's THE BEST PHOTO OF US EVER TAKEN!!!!!!!

Curious...??? ^_~























PREPARED for our MAGNIFICENCE?!?



*ahem ahem*

 

 

 

*ahem ahem*

HAHAHAHA!!!!!! XD

And good night now, I'm off to massage Kika (my cuzin) & then sleep tightly by duckyboy's bony side. ^___^
He's leaving on Friday........ *cries an ocean* TT_TT

I hope you've liked the pics. ^^

Fine.
FINE.

In few mins I'm off to school after one week of laziness with my dearest duckyboy. And in the end of this week he's going home. *cries an ocean*
And the winter has returned, it's -8C now. *fumes*

FUCKING FINE! >_<

I. HATE. IT.

Can't anyone stop the time? Or let money grow on the trees so I'd go to KL, rent an apartment, attend a private international school & go to Pulau Perhentian during my school holidays?
Be able to wash my hair in the morning without fearing angina? Be able to wear max. 6 pieces of clothes at once (panties, bra, skirt/pants, t-shirt/tank top + flip flops)?
Not like now. I'm wearing panties, bra, socks, t-shirt, pants, jumper, jacket, scarf & gloves. 9. Aaaarrrgggghhhhh~~ Plus the boots of course. Aaaarrrrrggghhhh~~

OK, OK.
I must go now. =_= Wish me luck. *sigh*
What is left is to kiss sleeping duckyboy & leave quietly like a hobbit. *sigh*

Duckies, pics from Vienna tmr (or well, technically today, just later) cuz it's over 3.30am here & duckyboy is trying to sleep while I'm typing as quietly as possible.

I don't use to be up till this late but I couldn't stop watching Winter Sonata!!!!! :P 
I love it. I simply LOVE it. ^__^
It makes me melt, it makes me cry, it makes me smile, it makes me remember many things.......ohhh...~~~ ^__________^

You know, there are times when I also think I have a certain Winter Sonata problem. But then.....I know I DON'T.
It'd be foolish to have one. The past is past & although the special theory of relativity allows the past being rewinded to the present & vice versa - I don't wish that to happen.
I'm happy now just as it is & grateful for it being as it is. ^^

(I'll be less happy this Monday what's gonna be a fucking awful day after 1 week of lazying around in PN & Belianske Tatry and even less happy this Friday when my dear duckyboy is leaving SVK - expect sentimental, teary-eyed, self-pitying, depressive entries!!!)

Duh~
VIENNA.
It was nice. But it was snowing again! >_< Can someone please STOP THE SNOWING???!!!???
Enuff of that stupid cold wind. Enuff of the white landscape with black leafless trees, grey sky, pukey greenish yellowish beige grass & dark, greyish brown mud.
ENOUGH. >_<

Oh. I digressed. :P
I bought a great above-knee long denim skirt at Kärtner Strasse's Pimkie & I totally love it. ^_^ To duckyboy I've gotten very sexai baby blue boxers with Homer Simpson (waahhahahhahahhahah) & we both have bought lotsa discounted CDs with singles.
Well, I bought just Usher's "Burn". R&B rulezz! ^^;;;


Oh, well.
More details later today. It's 3.50am now & I really should go sleep & think about my lovely sayangs in Winter Sonata. ^^
GOOD NIGHT!!!!!

I've found a stupidly kool meme at this blog & I feel like taking it too. :P
Forgive me for being boring. No mood to write fairy tales or whatever.



1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
"After a while he stepped up, and with the spike on his staff scratched a queer sign on the hobbit's beautiful green front-door."
That was from JRR Tolkien's The Hobbit. ^_^

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can.
Ho. I'm reaching my sexai new little ceramic mugs I bought in Zdiar. Pink & green. SPRING colors!

3.What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Dunno. Some music videos.

4.Without looking, guess what time it is:
11.12AM

5.Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11.08AM! Yay! Close! ^^

6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Ehh...nuffin. If we don't count the Thai online radio I'm just listening to.

7.When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Off to Aupark with duckyboy to buy stuffs & eat.

8.Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
At duckyboy sleeping, thinking whether I should wake him up now or later or never cuz in a while I must go outside with Haku.

9.What are you wearing?
Sexai pink boxers my cuzin bought me in the US, stripy tank top & baby blue hoody. (Ohh, ohh, where is my baby blue hip-hop towel?)

10.Did you dream last night?
Yeah although...I dunno what. u_u
But last time I had some mad dream with duckyboy, Pom, Fong & some Chinese girl with LOTS of make-up. Very funny & weird and scary. Hehe. :P

11. When did you last laugh?
I dunno! O_o So stupid. =_=

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Framed photos, poster of a beach, poster with anti-fur slogan & shelves with books & flowers. Oh, and a Korean wooden mask which Jong-Moon oppa brought me from Korea. ^^

13. Seen anything weird lately?
Yeah, today in the forest. There were random pages from a schoolgirl's/schoolboy's diary with notes like: "Maths - hw, page 45; Eng - dunno; Chem - a test".
Me & duckyboy were guessing to find a dead body around but luckily it didn't happen.

14. What do you think of this quiz?
So crazy. :P But nice one, it doesn't require too much IQ which I don't possess. XD

15. What is the last film you saw? 
Ong-Bak The Thai Warrior. A very kool movie but not enuff hot Thai guys. *sniff* Haha, I'm so vain. *slaps ducky butt* XD 

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Yaaaayyy!!!! *glitters in eyes*
I'd go buy that house in Thailand I dreamt abt last time. ^___^ Then I'd go & buy business class airtickets to all my lovely friends & we would go there together & travel around and enjoy posh life. Haha!
Also I'd donate money to charity, book an airtic to KL & buy some extra super kool Thai silk dress.
Oh & I would buy a grey horse. ^___^ My Thai dream house was located in a jungle so I need some transport. Hehehehe. ^^

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I'm unshaved *down there*! MWAHAHAAA!!!! There you go! *evil laughter* I guess you won't know anymore! XD

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
No more DEFORESTATIONS please. Fuckin idiotic to destroy the environment like that. >_<

19. Do you like to dance?
Sometimes I do. The only one problem is that I'm not too good at it! Hah!

20.George Bush:
Ggggrrrrrrr aaaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhhhh paskapuhetta. >_<

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Depends on her nationality (as I wanna adopt also) but I like the names Yasmine, Amelia, Anna or maybe Sophia...

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Depends on his nationality also.
But - deer mai baibee, don't faint - I love the name Ilkka!!! ^__^

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Sure!!!
But only if the country is warm enuff, has sea & good food and nice people. So I'd go to Greece/South Korea/Singapore/Thailand or Malaysia. ^^ Oh yes or maybe Australia also.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
(I don't really believe in God but OK, for this time let's imagine I do~)
"I'm so proud of you for living such a meaningful life!" ^_^

25. 4 people who must also do this meme in THEIR journal:
Hey, I'm not forcing anyone to do anything. Just take it if you feel like it. ^^





Fine, fine. Off with Haku now! ^^

Here, here my duckies!

MANY PICS!!!!! ^___^

First those from Piestany:

A special DUCKY PIC for the members of The Ducky Society - baibee, hubooby & Nisah! ^_~ QUACK!!! ^__^


Aiyah. Two smiling duckies. Don't tell me that I do NOT have pretty eyes here or I'll pluck off your feathers. >_> XD


Fucking depressive Vah in Piestany. >_< I NEED SPRING!!!!


Look at my INTELLECTUAL FACE. *faints from emmbarrasment*




Pics from Belianske Tatry:

The cottage & father's car. We've had a nice apartment on the 1st floor.


Retarded pic of me with hamster's teeth reaching my knees & my grandma with a grim face behind.


I love horses. ^_^ There were many of these! Yay!


Zdiar, the village nearby Poland we were at located in the Spis province. Nice, isn't it? ^_^


THIS IS HOW BEAUTIFUL BELIANSKE TATRY ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dangerous & beautiful in the winter especially. Very good for hiking in the summer tho. ^_^


The last pic of me being VERY annoyed by waiting for the stupid bus to come. Heh.


Liked the pics? ^_~


Very randomly - I bought a new Mango tank top!!!! WAHOOOOO!!!! On a sale...lavender violet (no glitters or feathers, sorry baibee & hubooby XD) with green & beige stuffs....hohoo...I luv it! :D

Duh~
My classmate told me I missed three tests (English, Chemistry & Society Studies) so I can look forward to a shitty week. =_= BEAUTIFUL. =_= *drops dead*

Anyways. I must go for a walk with Haku now & then I MUST watch Winter Sonata. I was dying without it for the whole time in PN & Zdiar so tonight is gonna be a KOREAN NIGHT. Can't wait!!!!!

...Or maybe TWO!
Or perhaps THREE. :P

Thing No. 1:

I MISSED YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really did.....yah.....hubooby, baibee, Munie, Justine, ducky sis, Tsung Long, Wei Hui, Pui, Manis, Heather, gila Pom, Li Hong.................................................

I AM SOO HAPPY TO *BE* WITH YOU AGAIN!! ^___^

And I've talked to mai baibee finally. Such a sweet elkie is he. ^_^
Waaaaahhh BAIBEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Come here in 2007~~~ COME COMEEEEEEEEE! :D (You hubooby also & you duckyboy too. Just please don't fight, OK? And hey, Pom the real guy come too & Tsung Long as well and it's gonna be FUN! ^_~ And Munie & Nisah as well! WAH! :D Wahooo!!!)

Gila Pom has sent me pics of himself being a little gila pom pom & he looked so damn funny & cute. *dies laughing*
It was X-rated tho. Children pornoghraphy!!! POMnography!!! AAaaaaaHHHhhhh!!!! @_# Naked kid Pom1 & then naked kid Pom2 hiding his *ahem ahem* with a plastic pot or whateva. XD Duh~~ Now I know the intimate secrets of my ex-bf. How fascinating. *dramatic slap on the head* XD

Thing No. 2:

Justine looks GREAT in her new haircut! ^__^ Yay!!!

Thing No. 3:

I'm gonna buy a spring green eyeshadow tmr, I swear I will.
Ah lian or no, broke or no, I NEED it!!!
I'll post pics of myself in that then. ^_~ 
I swear I'll look GOOD. as good as all handsome Koreans & Thais will be falling down to my feet asking me for just one tender kiss & just one look at their mesmerized faces! HAHA!!!!!!

But then...THEN..!!!

Then....I'll tell them that my heart belongs to MY ONLY TWO & come & kiss duckyboy & Pom the keychain whom I still haven't washed. =_= :S 
HAH!!!!

Ces't la vie!

FINALLY   I'M HOME.

And fuckin shit, I'm so angry. Everything what could've gone shitty, did. >_<

Firstly my grandma made me upset (as she never fails to).
Then we've waited 1.45hr for stupid retarded bus which was supposed to take us from Zdiar to Poprad.
Then we've waited for the train to come. From Poprad to Bratislava. 5.5hrs in train. =_= In that train we've came across another trouble - damaged car so we had to change the car. Fuck. Duckyboy's cap forgotten there by me. =_= (Sorry Ray, I'll get ya another cap.)
Then my mother came to fetch us & told me that those my paintings she was supposed to bring to my Phy prof for one anal project are still in her car & the deadline for it was this Monday. Fuck. No bonus points for Phy & that means I'm gonna fail it this yr FOR SURE. =_= #_@
And today Haku bit me a bit. Fucker dog. >_<

On the trip briefly:

* TOO MUCH SNOW.
* TOO MUCH ICE.
* TOO MUCH COLD WEATHER.
* TOO MUCH GRANDMA.
* TOO LITTLE ASIAN FOOD (none!!!!). 
* Too little internet (none).
* A LOT OF BEAUTIFUL MOUNTAINS!!!! <-- pix tmr! ^^
* TOO LITTLE WINTER SONATA (none!!!!!!!!).

Aiyah. That's it.
I'm gonna see what ingredients for Thai rice with chicken am I missing, tmr I'm gonna buy it & cook it also! HAH! :D

Oh, and that reminds me of going to wash Pom the Keychain. Poor my babyblue darling was wiping everything in the train today. u_u So cruel & unhygienic!!!! T_T

Nites, duckies~ :D